Showing posts with label Relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationship. Show all posts
Monday, July 13, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Thirteen terribly weird facts about women
It is generally believed that the difference between men and women is enormous. Women and men differ in almost every imaginable aspect of human life, especially when it comes to psychology.
A woman does not have a man’s habit to scratch her noggin when she thinks of an answer to a confusing question, for example. Women doe not like to show they are confused. They never want to ruin their hairdo with that gesture either.
Women will never understand why footballers stand in a line with their hands crossed before a penalty kick during a match. In addition, women never shudder when a male character gets kicked in the groin in a movie.
When a woman yawns she covers her mouth with the palm of her hand, not with a fist.
After taking a bath, a woman grabs a towel and makes a turban on her head from it, at least for one minute. The reasons of such a weird Oriental ritual are unknown.
A woman does not get mad when her underwear gets stuck between her buttocks. Women joyfully wear those items of torture called bikinis.
Many women worry about their looks when having sex.
Women open bottles with bottle openers.
A woman feels awkward if she does not carry anything in her hands. That is why they always carry their handbags around.
Women are absolutely indifferent to their genitals; they hardly know each other. Women do not talk to them, they do not give funny nicknames to them and they never get angry with them.
Sitting down in public transportation, women keep their legs together. That is why men often prefer to sit next to a woman because in this case they can sit spread-eagle.
If a woman finds her fly unzipped in a public place, she does not seem to care too much about it.
When a woman dresses up to go out, she puts on a blouse first. Pants come second. Men work it vice versa.
Finally, when an act of love ends, women do not feel like sleeping. They feel like talking and kissing.
Translated by Dmitry സുടകൊവ്
Pravda.ru forum. The place where truth hurts
A woman does not have a man’s habit to scratch her noggin when she thinks of an answer to a confusing question, for example. Women doe not like to show they are confused. They never want to ruin their hairdo with that gesture either.
Women will never understand why footballers stand in a line with their hands crossed before a penalty kick during a match. In addition, women never shudder when a male character gets kicked in the groin in a movie.
When a woman yawns she covers her mouth with the palm of her hand, not with a fist.
After taking a bath, a woman grabs a towel and makes a turban on her head from it, at least for one minute. The reasons of such a weird Oriental ritual are unknown.
A woman does not get mad when her underwear gets stuck between her buttocks. Women joyfully wear those items of torture called bikinis.
Many women worry about their looks when having sex.
Women open bottles with bottle openers.
A woman feels awkward if she does not carry anything in her hands. That is why they always carry their handbags around.
Women are absolutely indifferent to their genitals; they hardly know each other. Women do not talk to them, they do not give funny nicknames to them and they never get angry with them.
Sitting down in public transportation, women keep their legs together. That is why men often prefer to sit next to a woman because in this case they can sit spread-eagle.
If a woman finds her fly unzipped in a public place, she does not seem to care too much about it.
When a woman dresses up to go out, she puts on a blouse first. Pants come second. Men work it vice versa.
Finally, when an act of love ends, women do not feel like sleeping. They feel like talking and kissing.
Translated by Dmitry സുടകൊവ്
Pravda.ru forum. The place where truth hurts
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Top 10 Things Better Than Sex
While researching this article I found so many things listed as “better than sex” that I started to wonder why anyone bothers at all anymore…
We’ve had sliced bread for quite a few years now so I guess the saying “it’s the best thing since sliced bread” has lost it’s impact because the new catchphrase for the ultimate comparison is that it’s “better than sex”.
Of course some people prefer food to sex so I guess sliced bread is better than sex in some cases… Confused yet? Keep reading!
10. Housework?
Photo by by Ciorra Photography
Over 30% of women surveyed claim that “cleaning gives them more satisfaction than sex”.
These are the results of a survey of two thousand women for the National Housework Survey of Great Britain 2006. Regarding this survey, the Independent Daily reported that “even in an age when women are making economic strides and excelling in the workplace, the one thing that gives the majority a sense of empowerment is a good go around the house with the vacuum cleaner — followed by some cleaning and dusting.”
These must be the same women who don’t find Mr. Muscle or the Brawny paper towel guy the least bit distracting. I mean who wouldn’t like a ‘good go around’ with one of these guys?
9. Dating A Vampire
Uploaded by Roberto Rizzato ?pix jockey?
Fans of the book or the movie Twilight know that you can’t have sex with your vampire boyfriend or he will probably kill you in a passionate fit. But you’re willing to make that sacrifice because you just love him so much.
He’s so wonderful that it’s all worth it - he’s extremely handsome, drives an expensive car, and he actually glitters in the sunlight. (Now what teen girl isn’t a sucker for glitter?)
Did I mention that he might sneak into your bedroom and stare at you all night while you are sleeping? Or that he’s condescending, emotionally distant, and rather sarcastic? Oh, and his body is ice cold, he’s murdered people in the past, and his friends and family instinctively want to drink your blood?
But I don’t care, mom, he’s dreamy!
8. Weight Loss
Photo by Laura Jones
According to a survey at AOLHealth.com, 26% of the moms who participated would rather “lose 10 pounds” than “have more sex”. Even more of them (30%) would rather “make more money” (not surprising, since you don’t actually get paid anything to be a mom…).
7. Music
Photo by by Shery Han
Findings from a survey conducted by Marrakesh Records: “Music is hugely important… 60% of 16-24 year-olds would rather go without sex than music for a week. This increases to 70% for 16-19 year-olds.”
Okay, I now have this whole teen sex/abstinence thing figured out – the RIAA (Recording Industry Association of America) should only prosecute pregnant teens and their boyfriends for downloading music illegally, that should be more effective than Bristol Palin’s Abstinence Campaign! Once a few kids are prosecuted and word gets around, teen pregnancies will decrease (of course, music downloading may increase…)
6. In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)
Photo by zetson
On the opposite side of the sex spectrum, I propose that IVF is better than sex if you’re trying to get pregnant…
Why take your chances with the genetic lottery system that is lovemaking when you can go embryo shopping with in vitro fertilization (IVF)? With IVF, you can get a Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis (PGD) – described in an article written by William Saleton at Slate.com as “a technique for weeding out flawed embryos”. At first PGD was used to identify (and reject) embryos that had fatal infant diseases. It was also only offered to high risk couples. But now, it’s being used to select an embryo based on a much wider scope of criteria (gender, non-fatal diseases and disorders). Just imagine what the possibilities are going to be like in the ഫുടുരെ(hair color, IQ, athlethicism, etc).
Now why would any practical (and wealthy) person choose to have a baby the old way- where you don’t know what you are going to get- when you can create your own custom kid? Think of the children! Is it fair to send your natural spawn to school with a bunch of genetic super kids?
5. Sports
The term better than sex is described as “a euphoric experience, often food-related, quite similar to an orgasm. Usually used by women, as for most men there is nothing better than sex” (urbandictionary.com). Nothing except sports, that is –
Why sports are better than sex:
1. People watch and cheer when you score.
2. If you don’t like your team you can wait until your contract ends and then play with someone else.
3. You can count on it all season.
4. You can watch it going on in your local bar.
5. It lasts over an hour and might even go into over time.
6. You can have a coach on the sidelines while you are doing it.
7. Action replays.
8. Protective equipment can be washed and re-used.
Apparently a lot of people have spent a lot of time coming up with lists of reasons why various sports are better than sex. I guess if you’re not ‘getting any’ you have the spare time…
Why soccer is better than sex:
1. You can be on top for 80 minutes and still come in second.
2. You can score using your head or your feet.
3. Size doesn’t matter. (jokewallpaper.com, The O’Byrne Files http://homepage.eircom.net/~nobyrne/choc.html)
Why hockey is better than sex:
1. A two-on-one or three-on-one is common.
2. People still play hockey after they are married.
3. Periods only last 20 minutes.
4. You can change players on the fly.
Why juggling (…juggling?) is better than sex:
1. You can juggle your balls in front of your grandma.
2. You don’t need a partner.
3. There’s nothing wrong with having blue balls. (thespoof.com)
Of course if you are a professional juggler you might as well pretend you don’t like sex very much, because you probably have the opportunity… unless there’s a cute mime who has the hots for you, or perhaps a unicyclist –
4. Sleep
Video by DonovanGroup
According to the Sleep Well website based out of Stanford University there are at least ten reasons why sleep is better than sex.
Among them: “sleep can last a good eight hours (or more)” and “while sleeping you can have sex with anyone you want”.
UK website The Independent reported that “almost 80 per cent of Britons prefer a good night’s sleep to sex”. This comes from a study conducted by the Edinburgh Sleep Centre where “79.2 per cent [of over 8,500 people] admitted they preferred the thought of extra sleep to sex.”
Of course, this could be one of those win-win situations: if you make sleep your priority at night that might give you more energy for all sorts of activity during the day (hint, hint)…
3. Food
Photo by Bob.Fornal
Food wins out over sex in so many ways. Most obviously, because you can order it in or enjoy it all by yourself without being judged…
There are 326 recipes called “Better Than Sex Cake” at Cooks.com alone. There is also one recipe at the same site called “Almost Better Than Sex Cake” – I’m guessing this is by the one home chef who has actually sampled both?
Of course if you prefer cookies, here is a better than sex cookie recipe.
I’ve also never heard anyone use the saying, “eat your brains out”… In fact, many foods are actually good for your brain. An article at cnn.com cites a study at Wheeling Jesuit University (West Virginia) that indicates that chocolate can improve “memory, attention span, reaction time, and problem-solving skills”.
Not convinced? Compare this to having sex “on the brain”, which has the exact opposite effect, causing: forgetfulness, distraction, and the inability to think clearly.
Chocolate is also an aphrodisiac, so if you choose chocolate over sex you may still end up with both…
2. Cell Phones
A survey conducted by Dial-a-Phone, a cell phone retailer in the UK, reported that “24 percent of women, but zero percent of men, would rather give up sex than their mobile phone for a month” (itwire.com). This makes sense, since I’m sure at least 24 percent of women have realized that a cell phone is better than a man (or woman, if that’s your thing):
1. You never have to prepare meals for your phone: in fact, it will help you get food delivered.
2. You can tell a phone to be silent or choose to ignore a phone without hurt feelings.
3. You can turn a phone on several times in a row – it’s always ready to go and it’s energy will lasts for hours (if not, you can just replace the battery).
4. A cell phone doesn’t care if you talk while the basketball game is on. In fact, the cell phone will let you watch Pride and Prejudice for the 27th time instead, if that’s what you want.
5. It has a call history that you can easily access to see if anyone else is pushing your phone’s buttons.
6. A cell phone is a silent witness to your long chats with your friends and does not make any sarcastic comments about them afterwards.
7. A cell phone doesn’t keep you from asking for directions, in fact it will get them for you.
8. A cell phone is almost always in your car yet it never comments on your driving.
9. A cell phone set to T9 mode will hang on to your every word and anticipate what you are trying to say.
10. And there’s always that handy vibrate mode if you get lonely…
1. The Internet
Photo by Aghenor ITA
According to Judy Mottl’s article The Internet: Better than Sex?, an Intel-sponsored survey found that “46 percent of women and 30 percent of men would rather abstain from sexual activity for two weeks than go without Internet access for the same timeframe. The percentage spikes higher, to 49 percent, among women ages 18 to 34 years old and to a whopping 52 percent for 35 years old to 44 years old.” (wi-fiplanet.com)
Reasons given by the same article for why the Internet is so important:
1. The ability to stay in touch with family and friends.
2. More efficient shopping.
3. A better grip on personal/financial activities thanks to online services.
I’m pretty sure that making any of the above claims about your sex life would just get you into trouble!
Honorable Mention:
The Microwave -“A survey of 1000 Australian women found most women voted for the microwave as the most liberating invention of the past 30 years” says an article on Australian website news.com.au. This survey was sponsored by Lean Cuisine, the frozen meal company, so I find it a bit suspicious. The dishwasher came in second and the pill lower on the list. Australian microwaves must have different features than the ones around here. Or perhaps, if you stand in front of one long enough, you don’t need the pill?
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Anatomically Correct Slow Jam
This song explains in a funny way a sexual relation. Thanks CollegeHumor!!
Monday, May 25, 2009
Famous Geeks Make Babies With Hollywood Celebrities
What if Free Software icon Richard M. Stallman got married with Hollywood superstar Angelina Jolie and had a child? What will their baby look like? I know most of you out there are curious so let’s find out with the help of this interesting website called makemebabies.com. –-They have the technology to generate images of future babies by combining photos.
Before you go on, do take note that these are all for fun and should not be taken seriously. Now let’s make babies with some of the famous geeks paired with some of the hottest Hollywood celebrities:
Before you go on, do take note that these are all for fun and should not be taken seriously. Now let’s make babies with some of the famous geeks paired with some of the hottest Hollywood celebrities:
Richard M. Stallman:
With Angelina Jolie...
With Britney...
With Halle Berry...
Bill Gates:
With Angelina Jolie...
With Britney...
With Halle Berry...
Steve Jobs:
With Angelina Jolie...
With Britney...
With Halle Berry...
Linus Torvalds:
With Angelina Jolie...
With Britney...
With Halle Berry...
UPDATE: A fan of Steve Ballmer emailed us and wanted his idol to make babies with Hollywood celebrities too. So let’s give him a chance folks by pairing Ballmer with the beautiful Paris Hilton. Here’s the result:
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Sunday, May 24, 2009
20 Great One Liners
1. Regular naps prevent old age… especially if you take them while driving.
2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.
3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried- but they wanted cash.
5. A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school uniforms.
6. Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
7. Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without… but whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.
8. You can’t buy love. . But you pay heavily for it.
9. True friends stab you in the front.
10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.
11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong and she agrees with me.
14. Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
15. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
16. It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
17. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.
18. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.
19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
20. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books
Understanding Men
1. The nice men are ugly.
2. The handsome men are not nice.
3. The handsome and nice men are gay.
4. The handsome, nice, and heterosexualmen are married.
5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nicemen, have no money.
6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.
7. The handsome men without money are after our money.
8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don’t think we are beautiful enough.
9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have no money, are cowards.
10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have money and thank God are straight, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!
11. The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.
Great Benifits of Kissing
- It is a matter of record that Canadian porcupines kiss one another on the lips.
- The world's longest kiss took place on January 28, 2002. Lousia Almodovar and Rich Langly of New Jersey kissed for a record 30 hours, 59 minutes and 27 seconds on a segment of "Ricki Lake".
- Matrimonial pollsters' studies prove that a man who kisses his wife good-bye when he leaves for work every morning averages a higher income than does the fellow who doesn't do that thing.
- In medieval Italy kisses weren't taken, or given, lightly. If a man and a woman were seen embracing in public they could be forced to marry!
- Our brains have special neurons that help us locate each others lips in the dark. (It's really true too! I've tried it!)
- It is estimated that the average person will spend about 20,160 minutes kissing in their lifetime.
- You burn 26 calories in a 1 minute kiss.
- The first kiss ever shown in a movie was in 1896. The movie, was called The Kiss.
- Hershey's Kisses got their name because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
- 50% of all people kiss before they turn 14. Kissing helps reduce tooth decay. Kissing increases the mouth's production of saliva, and saliva helps clean the mouth thus aides prevention of tooth decay.
Some Hot Kissing Posses...
Top 50 job interview questions answered the way they should be
Welcome to the world of ambiguity.
Job interviews are often filled with unnecessary questions and ambiguity. The problem is so common that I often dream about the opportunity to apply for a job I don't want just to see how it unfolds. Based on the top 50 interview questions available at Trader's Psychology (the undisputed leader of all things Job Interview), I have provided an example of how that interview might go down:
1. Tell me about yourself:
Do you want the whole thing or just bits and pieces. I have a very 'storied' past.
2. Why did you leave your last job?
I didn't. It left me.
3. What experience do you have in this field?
I have worked in it.
4. Do you consider yourself successful?
Yes.
5. What do co-workers say about you?
I've never asked them to talk about me.
6. What do you know about this organization?
That you have a job opening.
7. What have you done to improve your knowledge in the last year?
I have read the news and I watch public television and listen to public radio.
8. Are you applying for other jobs?
Not at the moment, but I applied for tons of jobs earlier this week.
9. Why do you want to work for this organization?
I don't recall saying I did. Do you already know why you want me to work for you?
10. Do you know anyone who works for us?
No, if I did, I probably wouldn't have to sit through this BS.
11. What kind of salary do you need?
One that gives me as much income as possible and one that absolutely maximizes the income limitations of this job.
12. Are you a team player?
I used to be but I hung up the cleats and skates. I usually play individual sports now like Poker and Darts.
13. How long would you expect to work for us if hired?
That's a very good question. Probably until something better comes along.
14. Have you ever had to fire anyone? How did you feel about that?
No, but if given the chance, I would fire tons of people.
15. What is your philosophy towards work?
I do, therefore I work.
16. If you had enough money to retire right now, would you?
Tell me...when you're at the movie theater, do you ask people what they're doing there?
17. Have you ever been asked to leave a position?
Yes, but I am very convincing. It's all good.
18. Explain how you would be an asset to this organization
I would be an asset because I am valuable and useful, thus fulfilling the definition of the word asset.
19. Why should we hire you?
I am available and you are obviously short one employee.
20. Tell me about a suggestion you have made
I once told Perkins that they need to bring the wishing well back. The wishing well was an area near the front of the restaurant that offered children free plastic toys. It's the only reason I still eat at Perkins. I'm still awaiting my chance at making a plastic frog leap once again.
21. What irritates you about co-workers?
Many things, but mostly that they work longer hours than I do
22. What is your greatest strength?
Probably my rear deltoids. I've been hitting those pretty hard at the gym.
23. Tell me about your dream job.
Three words: San Fernando Valley
24. Why do you think you would do well at this job?
It seems you are doing well and I'm fairly certain I can outperform you.
25. What are you looking for in a job?
Mostly income.
26. What kind of person would you refuse to work with?
It would suck to work with myself.
27. What is more important to you: the money or the work?
This isn't a volunteer gig, is it? The job post said 'paid full-time'.
28. What would your previous supervisor say your strongest point is?
Avoidance and Deception. It's a tie.
29. Tell me about a problem you had with a supervisor
One of them had very bad breath. It was a huge problem for the whole office.
30. What has disappointed you about a job?
I had a job where they promised a full month of wearing jeans. You can imagine my excitement. Later, I came to find out that I had to donate money to United Way in order to sport my denim. This was very disappointing because I had just purchased 3 new pairs of jeans.
31. Tell me about your ability to work under pressure.
How many pascals are we talking? Are we talking about atmospheric or water pressure?
32. Do your skills match this job or another job more closely?
What other job?
33. What motivates you to do your best on the job?
Shane Falco, QB for Ohio State when they lost in the Sugar Bowl once said "Pain heals, chicks dig scars...glory lasts forever." So probably money.
34. Are you willing to work overtime? Nights? Weekends?
Are you hitting on me?
35. How would you know you were successful on this job?
When I arrive to work each day and I leave work under my own will.
36. Would you be willing to relocate if required?
Not within the confines of the office but I'm willing to negotiate.
37. Are you willing to put the interests of the organization ahead of your own?
Castration is illegal in the lower 48.
38. Describe your management style.
I just did.
39. What have you learned from mistakes on the job?
That it is usually other people's fault.
40. Do you have any blind spots?
I don't see how my car or vision fits into this equation.
41. If you were hiring a person for this job, what would you look for?
I wouldn't be looking because I know I'm available.
42. Do you think you are overqualified for this position?
I am always overqualified unless there are physical limitations. I did a summer of roofing buildings. Placing me closer to the sun is not a good idea.
43. How do you propose to compensate for your lack of experience?
The same way you compensate for your surplus of arrogance.
44. What qualities do you look for in a boss?
Someone who doesn't care what I'm doing and forgets about stuff.
45. Tell me about a time when you helped resolve a dispute between others.
A group of friends could not agree on the top 100 comedies of all time. I helped resolve the dispute by creating a google spreadsheet during work. It's all about providing the tools necessary for people to come to a healthy resolution.
46. What position do you prefer on a team working on a project?
Wow. Didn't expect this one. Probably reverse cowgirl?
47. Describe your work ethic.
If you ask me to deliver, I will deliver. If you ask me to get it done tomorrow, and it takes one day, you'll have it by tomorrow. If you ask me to get it done next week, and it takes one day, you'll get it next week. It's all about balancing free time and expectations.
48. What has been your biggest professional disappointment?
Probably this interview.
49. Tell me about the most fun you have had on the job.
Without getting into too much detail, it involved over sized beef jerky sticks and resulted in a customer complaint.
50. Do you have any questions for me?
Three of them.
1) How many more questions are there?
2) Are you going to offer me the job?
3) How much are you going to pay me?
Source
READ MORE - Top 50 job interview questions answered the way they should be
Job interviews are often filled with unnecessary questions and ambiguity. The problem is so common that I often dream about the opportunity to apply for a job I don't want just to see how it unfolds. Based on the top 50 interview questions available at Trader's Psychology (the undisputed leader of all things Job Interview), I have provided an example of how that interview might go down:
1. Tell me about yourself:
Do you want the whole thing or just bits and pieces. I have a very 'storied' past.
2. Why did you leave your last job?
I didn't. It left me.
3. What experience do you have in this field?
I have worked in it.
4. Do you consider yourself successful?
Yes.
5. What do co-workers say about you?
I've never asked them to talk about me.
6. What do you know about this organization?
That you have a job opening.
7. What have you done to improve your knowledge in the last year?
I have read the news and I watch public television and listen to public radio.
8. Are you applying for other jobs?
Not at the moment, but I applied for tons of jobs earlier this week.
9. Why do you want to work for this organization?
I don't recall saying I did. Do you already know why you want me to work for you?
10. Do you know anyone who works for us?
No, if I did, I probably wouldn't have to sit through this BS.
11. What kind of salary do you need?
One that gives me as much income as possible and one that absolutely maximizes the income limitations of this job.
12. Are you a team player?
I used to be but I hung up the cleats and skates. I usually play individual sports now like Poker and Darts.
13. How long would you expect to work for us if hired?
That's a very good question. Probably until something better comes along.
14. Have you ever had to fire anyone? How did you feel about that?
No, but if given the chance, I would fire tons of people.
15. What is your philosophy towards work?
I do, therefore I work.
16. If you had enough money to retire right now, would you?
Tell me...when you're at the movie theater, do you ask people what they're doing there?
17. Have you ever been asked to leave a position?
Yes, but I am very convincing. It's all good.
18. Explain how you would be an asset to this organization
I would be an asset because I am valuable and useful, thus fulfilling the definition of the word asset.
19. Why should we hire you?
I am available and you are obviously short one employee.
20. Tell me about a suggestion you have made
I once told Perkins that they need to bring the wishing well back. The wishing well was an area near the front of the restaurant that offered children free plastic toys. It's the only reason I still eat at Perkins. I'm still awaiting my chance at making a plastic frog leap once again.
21. What irritates you about co-workers?
Many things, but mostly that they work longer hours than I do
22. What is your greatest strength?
Probably my rear deltoids. I've been hitting those pretty hard at the gym.
23. Tell me about your dream job.
Three words: San Fernando Valley
24. Why do you think you would do well at this job?
It seems you are doing well and I'm fairly certain I can outperform you.
25. What are you looking for in a job?
Mostly income.
26. What kind of person would you refuse to work with?
It would suck to work with myself.
27. What is more important to you: the money or the work?
This isn't a volunteer gig, is it? The job post said 'paid full-time'.
28. What would your previous supervisor say your strongest point is?
Avoidance and Deception. It's a tie.
29. Tell me about a problem you had with a supervisor
One of them had very bad breath. It was a huge problem for the whole office.
30. What has disappointed you about a job?
I had a job where they promised a full month of wearing jeans. You can imagine my excitement. Later, I came to find out that I had to donate money to United Way in order to sport my denim. This was very disappointing because I had just purchased 3 new pairs of jeans.
31. Tell me about your ability to work under pressure.
How many pascals are we talking? Are we talking about atmospheric or water pressure?
32. Do your skills match this job or another job more closely?
What other job?
33. What motivates you to do your best on the job?
Shane Falco, QB for Ohio State when they lost in the Sugar Bowl once said "Pain heals, chicks dig scars...glory lasts forever." So probably money.
34. Are you willing to work overtime? Nights? Weekends?
Are you hitting on me?
35. How would you know you were successful on this job?
When I arrive to work each day and I leave work under my own will.
36. Would you be willing to relocate if required?
Not within the confines of the office but I'm willing to negotiate.
37. Are you willing to put the interests of the organization ahead of your own?
Castration is illegal in the lower 48.
38. Describe your management style.
I just did.
39. What have you learned from mistakes on the job?
That it is usually other people's fault.
40. Do you have any blind spots?
I don't see how my car or vision fits into this equation.
41. If you were hiring a person for this job, what would you look for?
I wouldn't be looking because I know I'm available.
42. Do you think you are overqualified for this position?
I am always overqualified unless there are physical limitations. I did a summer of roofing buildings. Placing me closer to the sun is not a good idea.
43. How do you propose to compensate for your lack of experience?
The same way you compensate for your surplus of arrogance.
44. What qualities do you look for in a boss?
Someone who doesn't care what I'm doing and forgets about stuff.
45. Tell me about a time when you helped resolve a dispute between others.
A group of friends could not agree on the top 100 comedies of all time. I helped resolve the dispute by creating a google spreadsheet during work. It's all about providing the tools necessary for people to come to a healthy resolution.
46. What position do you prefer on a team working on a project?
Wow. Didn't expect this one. Probably reverse cowgirl?
47. Describe your work ethic.
If you ask me to deliver, I will deliver. If you ask me to get it done tomorrow, and it takes one day, you'll have it by tomorrow. If you ask me to get it done next week, and it takes one day, you'll get it next week. It's all about balancing free time and expectations.
48. What has been your biggest professional disappointment?
Probably this interview.
49. Tell me about the most fun you have had on the job.
Without getting into too much detail, it involved over sized beef jerky sticks and resulted in a customer complaint.
50. Do you have any questions for me?
Three of them.
1) How many more questions are there?
2) Are you going to offer me the job?
3) How much are you going to pay me?
Source
Woman kills her husband with killer-divan
A woman, who became a widow as she attempted to teach a lesson to her lazy husband, was convicted at a St. Petersburg court. The woman literally killed the man with a divan. 
The court brought down a conditional sentence for the period of one year against Vera Lukyanova, 55, and found the woman guilty of involuntary manslaughter, Fontanka.ru reports with a reference to the press service of the St. Petersburg Office of the Public Prosecutor.
The tragedy occurred in the summer of 2008. The man had a hangover in the morning after he had drunk too much alcohol the day before. His wife was infuriated with her husband’s behavior. In a fit of anger she kicked the convertible divan, on which the man was resting, and the divan folded into two and gripped the man in a vice.
Forensic experts said that the man died instantly: the strong springs of the killer-divan broke the man’s ribs and even his spine.
Anna Kournikova kicks Enrique Iglesias out because of dogs
Former tennis player and now fashion star Anna Kournikova kicked Enrique Iglesias out of her house. 
The singer has been dating Kournikova for six years already. The sweet couple decided to share one roof about six months ago. The dream went up in smoke very quickly: the willful Russian girl showed Iglesias the door.
“We’ve spent six months living together, but she kicked me out of the house. We had a fight and made it up very soon, but she does not let me move back in,” the saddened signer said.
However, the singer continues to worship the Russian beauty even if he is not allowed to ring her bell.
“She is a wonderful, beautiful, strong and independent woman. The reasons for the fight were stupid. It was something about dogs,” Iglesias says.
Friday, May 22, 2009
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